By Lisa

Hi there, nice to meet you! I am Lisa, writer of the blog Mind and Body Intertwined. I started my blog to find out how to live a healthy, balanced and most of all happy life and to help others do the same. 

However, long before this was the case, I was a small girl, trying to figure out the world and getting to know myself along the way. I had always been a kind little girl and my greatest sadness came from people fighting with each other, even if I wasn’t involved. The class I was in had a lot of bullies and people that didn’t mind fighting at all, so I would often go and play alone to avoid the negativity. The last years on that school, I was at the receiving end of the bullying and I tried to avoid having to deal with those people even more.

Then, I went to high school and the first three years were kind of similar. There weren’t as many bullies, but due to the fact I was so quiet, nobody paid much attention to me, which was fine at that moment. I did have some friends and if there was drama, I could easily walk away. The other three years, most of us had to switch to another location, with a very different dynamic. In this new school, I got a group of friends and they were actually known for being loud. I blossomed in this new environment and it became easier and easier to have casual conversation with people I didn’t know before and to speak up when I needed to. I wrote more about this time of my life in this post.

This all continued in university, where I joined a sorority and even started a part-time job in sales. Would you believe it? That quiet girl who never dared to make a sound was now going up to people, asking them to buy something without any hesitation. But still, sometimes I would find myself in awkward situation. At the time, I was also in therapy for some other things, but I decided to discuss this with her. I always thought I learned to be loud, because when I became louder, people didn’t dare to be mean anymore. Being loud meant being safe. She asked me whether I felt more like an introvert or an extrovert. I said I thought myself to be an extravert, but in the end, I would always be an introvert.

However, now that I’m older (and who knows, maybe even wiser), I realise it’s the other way around. I now remember that before the bullying started, I would always invite people over and I would be sad when nobody had time. I was always looking for the social angle of things and by the time I was 8 years old, I figured out that I wanted to work with people. Bullying gave me a fear of being rejected and hindered me in my social skills, but at heart, I love being with people. It is actually so extreme that when I have panic attacks, it helps me to go to crowded places, because it makes me feel calmer than being alone. At work, I’d rather be around people that are talking than in a room alone, where it is quiet.

Luckily, in the time that I was lonely, I learned how to be alone and be okay with that. I found the perfect balance between not feeling lonely when I’m alone, but also to be able to get energy from the people around me. For me, this is just another example of how the bad things in your life can shape you to be better than you would be otherwise. 

How about you? Are you more of an introvert or more of an extrovert and how do you deal with ‘the other side’ of life? Let me know in the comments below! I would also love to thank Eric and April for sharing their beautiful platform with me. Also, if you liked what you saw, please subscribe at Mind and Body Intertwined to get to know me a little better!

Lots of love,

Lisa