Seasons of Love
Michelle Oram
Hi! I’m Michelle from BoomerEcoCrusader.com. First, a big thank you to Eric from The Thoughtful Beggar for inviting me to be part of this “Love Is” series.
Love. It’s a word we throw around casually every day. “I love pizza.” “I love your dress.” “I love my job.” “I love you.” But, what is love? This article from Psychology Today tells us the ancient Greeks identified seven different types of love. In February, the hearts and flowers all relate to romantic love, or Eros. It’s what many of us think of when we hear the word love.
But, throughout our lives, we experience most or all of the seven types of love identified by the ancient Greeks. Who, and how, we love changes throughout our lives. Let’s look at how these “seasons of love” align with the four seasons of the year.
Spring represents the early years of our lives. It’s a time of rebirth and discovery. The first love we experience in the spring of our lives is the love between parent and child. The Greeks called this unconditional, familial love Storge.
Later in spring, we mature and transition to different kinds of love and relationships. During the pre-teen and teen years, friendships become more important. The way we love our friends is what the Greeks called Philia.
As we move into Summer, in our teens and twenties, the love of parents and family members takes a back seat. In this season, we may experience Ludus, playful or uncommitted love that’s casual and uncomplicated. If we’re lucky, Cupid’s arrow strikes and passionate love, or Eros, comes into the picture.
It’s in the steamy heat of summer that many people meet their life partner and break away from their own families to form a new family unit.
As we reach middle age, we enter my favourite season Fall or Autumn. If we’re in a long-term relationship, the love we feel for our partner matures and changes as our children grow up and move into the summer of their own lives. The Eros of the early years transitions into the unconditional, familial Storge we experienced in the spring of our lives.
In our later years, Winter arrives. Like the cozy sweaters, wool socks and nights by the fire we love about winter, the passion of the early years may morph into what the Greeks called Pragma. It’s a practical love borne out of reason or duty and shared goals. Now, I know the young people reading this will think that sounds horrible. When we’re young, we all want to think that Ludus or Eros will go on forever. I’ll let you in on a little mystery of married life. The secret to making relationships work is adjusting to the changing seasons.
The sad part about winter is we may experience the loss of a long-time partner. Then, friendships (Philia) often return to the forefront to fill the void.
If you’ve been keeping track, we’ve covered five of the seven kinds of love identified by the ancient Greeks. The last two we can experience at any season of our lives.
Agape is universal, altruistic love. We often display it through acts of kindness and unselfish concern for others. This kind of love has feel-good benefits that can improve our physical and mental health, and extend our lives.
Philautia is self-love. That’s something we all need to work on because it helps us fully embrace and appreciate the other kinds of love in our lives.
Whatever kind of love you’re experiencing this February, embrace it and enjoy it. Happy Heart Month!
When I was thinking about who to ask to write for the Love Is series, Michelle’s name was one of the first that came to mind. Whether it is online in Twitter or in one of her blogs, she simply exudes compassion and caring, and we are so excited to have her be a part of this collaboration! To check out Michelle’s wonderful website and beautiful blogs click the image below!