As his eyes opened he noticed a middle-aged man sitting behind a desk kindly looking back at him with a warm, dazzling white smile. “Hey! Welcome back!” a round of applause erupts from what looks like a live studio audience on a sound stage. “Where am I?” said the young man while raising his hand to touch his head. “Randy, you’re in the great hereafter.” “You mean, like heaven?” responded Randy with his hand still holding his face. The man stands up from behind his desk and walks over to what looks like the set of a talk show to Randy and sits beside him. “Sort-of, but not really. Heaven is the best place a person can imagine, right? This is way better than that.” Randy begins to notice some of the faces in the audience. “So I’m dead?” “Well you’re certainly not on Earth anymore!” The audience laughs and claps. “You were riding all fast and crazy on your motorcycle after leaving the bar remember?” Randy’s mouth drops open as the scenes of the night flash through his mind. “That truck hit me!” “Well, it can be argued that you actually hit the truck, but yeah.” Randy slowly leans forward. “The paramedics couldn’t do anything?” The man stands up again and makes his way back behind his desk.“By the time the fire department arrived it was more of a clean up operation than anything. You were doing 115 mph around a turn and smacked right into a one ton truck. All they could do was hose everything down.” The man looks to the audience and winks as they chuckle lightly. Randy sits up and looks at the man behind the desk. “Who are you?” “My name is Michael, and I am the host for your after life party!” As that is said the audience begins to clap in unison and stands to their feet while balloons drop from the ceiling and confetti is shot out of cannons. Multi colored spotlights race around the room while whacky music, featuring the kazoo and slide whistle can be heard overhead. Michael claps along with the crowd for a bit then raises his hands and the room quickly quiets back down and the audience takes their seats. Randy unable to hide his confusion interjects “Is this a talk show?” Michael flashes his fabulous pearly whites and looks to the audience who begins to laugh and cheer. “Not quite.” Responds Michael while laughing and shaking his head. “We are here to look at, and celebrate your life Randy!”  

A choir begins singing as a large banner of Randy’s face is unfurled and lit up with spotlights. Michael stands up and looks to some notecards that he his holding and begins to read from them. “Now we are going to meet some of the folks who lives were impacted the most from you!” A petite and pretty woman steps into the aisle and is lit up with a spotlight. The moment Randy sees her he is so startled that his breath leaves his body. Michael continues to read from his card. “Hello lovely! How about you introduce yourself, and let us all know how you met Randy?” The woman hands her purse to the person sitting beside her and sheepishly steps forward. “Hello. I am Carol, and my youngest boy, Mark went to school with Randy.” “So they were friends?” asked Michael flipping onto the next note card. “No. They were in the same class all through school and he always bullied my Mark and called him terrible names.” Randy starts to squirm in his seat. “Oh, I see. So they didn’t really get along then?” “No. They got into a fight in high school and my Mark broke his nose.” Michael turns to Randy “Wow! Is that true Randy? Did her son break your nose?” Randy quietly looks at Michael while nodding yes. “It was because of Randy being such a jack-ass all those years that my Mark learned to stand up for himself. So thank you Randy.” Michael walks over to Carol and holds her hands. “Thank you Carol. Come on everybody let’s give her a big round of applause!” The audience claps as Carol returns to her seat. Michael looks to the next notecard. “All right we have someone else who wants to celebrate Randy’s life!” A spotlight turns on another woman as she makes her way down the aisle. Michael sees the woman and begins to walk toward her. “Hello lovely, please tell us your name and how you met Randy?” Randy closes his eyes and covers his face. “My name is Louise, and I met Randy when he started dating my daughter Samantha.” Michael flashes his million dollar grin. “Lovely to meet you Louise! What did you think of Randy when you met him?” asked Michael.“I thought he was a real ass-hole!” said Louise, also smiling. Michael blinks and nods as the audience laughs. “He was such a jerk to my daughter, and I never understood what she saw in him.” said Louise shaking her head. “Another rave review Randy!” Michael laughs and points. “That’s not the worst of it either!” chirped Louise. “They ended up getting engaged and he stood her up at the altar without a note or anything!” Michael rushes over and stands in front of Randy. “Did you really leave her like that?” Randy silently nods yes. Louise walks up to Randy and holds his hands. “Thank you for not marrying Samantha! First of all, you would have made a horrible husband, and it was because of you that she never allowed herself to be mistreated by a man again!” Michael hugs Louise and she turns and walks back to her seat while Randy sits with an extremely confused look on his face. “I just don’t understand. Why am I here, and why are they thanking me?” admitted Randy finally summoning up the courage to look Michael in the eyes. “It makes sense you’re a little shaken up, 10 minutes ago they were hosing you off of the front of a truck!” said Michael, again sitting in the seat next to him. “Life and death isn’t what it seems, and if there were no ass-holes allowed this place would be empty!” The audience explodes with laughter as Michael smiles and hugs Randy. “Let’s give it up for Randy everybody!” Michael pops up and holds both of their hands in the air. The audience again stands to their feet clapping in unison as music is played and spotlights race around the room.